Thursday, March 4, 2010

Hoarders

I have 2. Hope and Grace. They don't only look just alike. They act a lot alike, too. They're both really sensitive... and extremely sentimental about things. Like every single twig of grass they see they want to keep. Grace asked me if she could keep the little mesh bag the oranges came in the other day. She asked me if she could keep the knot off a popped balloon. "It's special!" she says, all whiny and pleading - like it's a family heir loom or something. Puh-lease.

I swear these two will be on a show one day... a reality one with interventions for hoarders... where clutter and junk has taken over their whole lives. TLC's new Hoarders, Buried Alive or something.

For Hope, I gave her several of these little bins.



One for rocks, pine cones, sea shells and the like. One for Valentines cards and birthday cards and letters and any paper she feels holds some significance (which includes an old tic-tac-toe post it..."But it's the first time we played tic-tac-toe, momma!"). There's another basket for stuffed animals. The rule is the same rule we have for all the children's toy buckets (big blue laundry hampers)... It's up to you what you want to keep, but it has to all fit in there, level with the top (not heaped over), no stuffing. Think I'm mean, don't you? I have 6 kids, people. In a house that wasn't exactly made for 6 kids. The madness has to stop somewhere!

Ever so often Hope has to be reminded of the rule, and to clean out her bins. Cause they end up looking like this:


It prompts all kinds of tears and pleading and, "but so-&-so gave this one to me!" and so on and so on. It's like I'm literally peeling the actual skin off her body. It's that painful. Don't feel sorry for her... Really, the monkey with no eyes or tail and knotted fur kicked the bucket long ago. If it's REALLY special, I'll put it away in the cedar chest.

And now Grace is falling in Hope's footsteps. I find little piles all over the place of her "treasures". Like this one:



And when I said, "Take those back outside, darling, they don't belong in the kitchen." It was met with immediate tears and dramatic pleas, and, "But, Mom, just look at this one, it's so beautiful, I can't put it back outside!" while she shook it only one inch from my eyes (like I could really focus on it that close). She desperately wanted me to see that goofy rock was obviously worth keeping. Umm.. it wasn't smooth or granite or sparkly or any special shape. Really, just a plain old dirty rock.

And then there was this pile of papers on her bed:



I mean seriously... that's a craft wreath no one ever finished for a Christmas project, a sheet of Faith's science notes, and one of Hubby's pay stubs with a scribbled appointment date and address on the back. The meanie I am says, "Grace throw those away." And she retorts, "but that's Daddy's handwriting!". Like I'm the wicked witch of the west because I would even dare throw away something He had written on.

As hard as it is to either of them to part with any of their treasures, they are incredibly sweet and thoughtful when it comes to doing things for and especially giving things to other people. Like these darn weeds, er... ahem... I mean beautiful flowers. I was being funny. I really do think they are beautiful. For now. But Lord help us when they wilt and I throw them away.....

4 comments:

40winkzzz said...

that was an amusing post. i confess to being somewhat of a hoarder. i am not quite as bad as your children, but i rather fear the possibility of becoming worse and worse as i get older. i hope i don't end up being one of those old ladies whose children, upon her move to a nursing home, go through her house discarding old paper grocery bags and piles of rubber bands and twist-ties...

Anonymous said...

Oh yeah, don't I certainly relate to this! There are mites in my closets, there are mites in my kitchen cabinet, in the piano bench, under the bed and there are mites in the trunk of my car. I even pack them in my suitcase when going on vacation. Yes, I know it's spelled might, as in I just "might" need this, but sometimes it can be just as irritating as the other kind. I swear it's hereditary.

Mandy said...

LOL!!! Oh girl this is Madison made over! She loves EVERYTHING and wants a box for each individual category of craziness she's decided to collect that day. I also have to really fight her to get her to throw away anything... it's nuts!

Stacie said...

I think you wrote this blog about my KL. Oh my! This is my daily life too! When I continued to throw out KL's plain rocks, she discovered "jewelry rocks", aka gray rock that parking lots are made of. "Mom, they are so shiny and pretty! They are so much better than plain rocks!" My secret is, they are thrown out too, but she thinks I have a "collection box" of all the ones she has picked up over the years. I also get fresh "beautiful flowers" daily during the spring and sobbing child when she sees them in the trash wilted and dead a day or so later. And I thought I went thur this cycle alone!